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    Tatu

    200Kmh In The Wrong Lane 1 ( 2003 )
    Not Gonna Get Us / All The Things She Said / Show Me Love / 30 Minutes / How Soon Is Now / Clowns / Malchik Gay / Stars / Ya Ghosla's Uma / Nas Ne Dagoniat / Show Me Love

    Huh, huh, huh.... they said gay...... Etc. Well, I'm not gonna do a bio here, I don't give a damn. I'm like that sometimes. So, let's assume we all know nothing about this latest chart topping act, and ignore any confusion. Let's focus on the music itself and ignore all image and other sundry information that may influence us. When I first saw the CD cover in the stores, it looked like a record company manufactured nu-metal band full of chiks. It isn't, it's a manufactured pop album, and you can hear the contemporary production, so much that it hurts. You can hear the weak vocals. God, you can hardly miss them, the vocals are painful to the ears, screetched and sounding at all times like two people singing together over a producer creating the music. Let's assume its not. Let's assume it's a 'proper' group, who all write, play and sing their own material. You see, I could dig out some information for you all right about now... but the thing is, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter whether the band are manufactured or not, what matters is that they sound manufactured. They sound very European.... and again, let's remind everyone i'm writing this with blanking my mind to all external information. I'm concentrating on exactly what's here in front of my ears. Oh my god, 'Show Me Love' is fucking awful, semi-eurovision crap. 'All The Things She Said' is comfortable pop music, the kind you can nod your head along to for exactly thirty seconds. After that time, you give up. The first thirty seconds is okay. The rest of the song repeats those first thirty seconds for four minutes or so. Why? It's a pop formula designed to sell songs to the masses. Idiocy for people who cannot concentrate for longer than 30 seconds. Can't remember idiosyncratic melodies or anything complex.

    There is nothing to see here..... Inexplicably given the heavily produced synthetic pop formula present throughout, Tatu cover a Smiths song. Erasure, or Megadeath, or Robbie Williams, or Tom Jones, or King Crimson, or Kylie Minogue would be better suited to covering a Smiths song than Tatu appear to be. This is so bad, it's fucking hilariously bad! It's the highlight of the entire album hearing two obviously young female vocalists ( they sound young. i'm playing dumb, remember ) emotionlessly make their way through a very emotional song. Sounds like a couple of twelve year old girls singing a karokee version. Sounds exactly like that. Such a lack of feeling, such misplaced vocals and ..... ah forget it. Forget that Tatu ever exist, or will exist, or have existed. Before I go, I should mention 'Malchik Gay', a song that makes 'Ace Of Base' sound like The Beatles! It's that good!

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    Readers Comments

    Tatu luver Akane238@hotmail.com
    Excuse me, but I was reading ur tatu review, and al I saw was a narrowminded asshole taking up internet space! U should learn about lesbians and their songs, because their high notes are NOT high at all! I can sing higher than that, and I do NOT have a high vocal range! I ahve the entire CD from front to back, and "Show me Love" Is one of my all-time favorite songs to listen to! Their music is different that the fucking pop shit we have to listen to all other times! I would seriously advise you tyo lighten up!

    melissa lamb melissa_lamb90@yahoo.com
    i love tatu it is the best singing group i have ever heard and i even love it when they sing in russian even though i dont understand it but i stil love it and i love all there song.

    lola@uchicago.edu
    ..ummm yeah, the other reader comments fucking suck. They're exactly what you'd expect from teeny-bopper tatu-wannabes: defensive, and lacking in both punctuation and substance. Seriously, I think most girls can sing higher than Tatu, "Tatu luver's" point being....? Listening to them makes me cringe. They're going to have no voices someday, not that it matters because their thirty seconds of manufactured fame are almost up. Oh and for anyone who thinks that Tatu is cooler than comparable American bands (think Aqua and the Barbie Girl phase that plagued middle school dances) because they sing IN RUSSIAN, your poseur attempts at being cultured have obviously failed. I can understand most of the Russian lyrics and I assure "melissa lamb" and others that the Russian words are possibly even LESS profound than those found in the English translated version that was reviewed. I can forgive Tatu for being bad, hell I can even forgive the uneducated masses for liking them, but the whole pseudo-lesbian thing has got to go. They're undermining the gay rights movement by doing things like making out on stage in order to attract attention from men (and there's no denying that that's exactly what they're trying to do in order to sell their pathetic records... notice how they sing the incredibly strophic "Malchick Gay" about wanting to turn a gay boy straight!). For anyone who maintains that because they won Eurovision they must be good.... oh wait, they DIDN'T win Eurovision. I think they came in second or third or something, in a competition that is notorious for boosting the sales of bad pop records (and being heavily mafia-influenced). For anyone who is still interested in listening to Russian pop (most of which is bad, anyway) I'd recommend Green Grey or the Leningrad Cowboys over Tatu any day. They're not great, but they're better than Tatu. They have to be.

    Sasca kpayne@telkomsa.net
    Ah, usually I agree with you, but here we must differ. Not that I'm an expert on Tatu but the first time I heard 'All the Things She Said' I loved it. Yearning, dramatic, lovely. I had no idea who was singing it, so can fairly claim that gay chic had no influence on me (And I should point out that Morrissey has been using that for years). As for the rest, I'm only now starting to listen to it but it seems promising.

    Kayla kittykat_12_9@hotmail.com
    Don't diss t.a.T.u like dat man!!!!!! Show me love ain't bad, It's good!!! so FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!! and Most girls can sing even higher then those russian chics do so *sticks tounge at the person who reviewed T.a.T.u's AWSOME c.d*

    davewouters@hotmail.com
    "they DIDN'T win Eurovision. I think they came in second or third or something, in a competition that is notorious for boosting the sales of bad pop records. WTF? I'm Belgian and our Urban Trad was second. They aren't crap at all! And I also like t.A.T.u.! They were third. And United Kingdom ... LAST PLACE!!!

    Alex Zaitsev zaitsev@perm.ru
    Yes, It's hard to believe, but the English lyrics are actually better than the Russian ones. As a Russian majoring in translation from English, I say that the translator has done his job very well. But alas, you can't make an absolute nadir of pop music even a bit enjoyable by doing a good translation of the lyrics. Can you imagine how bad this album is if an improved version of it is barely worth the lowest grade?

    jarboegira convol256@hotmail.com
    I see a lot of regurgitating of misinformed endless media crap: "manufactured pop, manipulated pseudo-lesbians who want attention" bla bla bla. Is it so hard to read up and think? Taty started out as an independent project, actually a folk project. The girls were selected from a casting four years ago, by their producer Ivan, a psychologist etc. who had nothing to do with Russian showbusiness! (not some large multinational record company). They worked for a while until they changed direction towards a pop project with lesbian tendencies. They had two huge hits THEN they signed to a record company, but Ivan's own company Neformat (means something like against format) is in control of everything. Now if they were so commercial and desperate for attention, how come Taty is managed in a disasterous way from a commercial point of view? Lots of cancelled promotion; it's hard to get interviews with the girls; the girls don't suck up to the media etc. Now why not have a lo! ok and read their interviews.. do these girls give you the slightest impression of being manipulated? Smart, mischiveous, excentric and very funny girls. Both girls have an 8-year classical education (Lena is a 3rd year student at the Moscow State University in the faculty of psychology, distance studying), and they are talented *musicians*. With regards to the lesbian question and their private lives in general, the girls have always been *deliberately* ambigious and vague. They are not fake lesbians - their so called lesbian image wasn't even a big issue until Western media put the label lesbian on them, and later fake-lesbian (if you don't believe me, take a look at the Russian album booklet or their video for 30 Minutes). This group is more their producer's than their own group. Since Ivan Shapovalov is an extrememely interesting and intelligent individual who loves to act against format and norms, I'm sure we can expect great things in the future too. All in all, it's hard to imagine a group that breaks so many (unwritten) rules of showbiz. How many of these pathetic indie bands nowadays who claim to be so independent are as uncompromising as Taty, and would dare to stand up for themselves half as much?

    As for me, I'm not fond of commercial music and pop music in general. I prefer industrial, black/death metal, alternative, goth etc. - yet I see something different in Taty. They have something like a punk spirit; not that I'm sure many of you are able to get that. Your loss. Their album is a gem, but I much prefer the Russian version. If you want to listen to it, the whole album + a bunch of remixes can be found on their OFFICIAL web site, www.taty.ru in 128kbps quality (not that many groups offer this eh?). The Russian lyrics also have a lot more depth to them than their English equivalents. It's a great thing that they kept the Russian rap in "Stars". This song isn't your average pop lyrics, and it deals with love, suicide and drugs.Tatu has created themselves a universe, and it addresses, to quote NME: "alienation, oppression, betrayal, rejection, inhibition". And no, Tatu isn't for dirty old men, take a look at their audience, the various boards, and mailinglist and you'll be surprised that the MAJORITY is young women.

    I'll conclude this with two quotes: Malcolm McLaren to Ivan Shapovalov "First of all, congratulations on a wonderful, mad piece of work". John Peel: (if you are a The Smiths fan you probably know his importance in The Smiths' career) "Love them or hate them, Tatu aren't your conventional pop act. They have put the fear of God in journalists and they have done a really quite good cover of The Smith's "How soon is now". Tatu's "don't give a fuck" attitude reflects Russia 2003 style"

    catherine grunge_rocks_9@hotmail.com
    TATU IS THE BEST DAMN GROUP EVER I ALWAYS LISTEN TO THERE MUSIC AND THINK ABOUT JULIA 24-7 !!!! I HAVE A ROOM AND SCRAP BOOK FULL OF PICTURES OF TATU AND JUST TO LET U KNOW THAT THEY R THE FUCKING BEST!!!!

    erhys wowza35@excite.com
    !!Luv it!! Just kidding you ugly piece of shit. Tatu will live forever long after stupid bands like good charlotte have died you know nothingyou piece of smelly ass. Adrianne is a girls name, so just die instead of dissing all the adriannes out their. oh, have i mentioned your mom and dad are ugly cunts??? Well i just did A Big fuck off from me to you!

    Phil alazan_axe@hotmail.com
    Sure, they might sound strange at first, but to be honest, they are one of the best groups around. They might not be the most beautiful as Britney Spears or Christina Augulera (sp), but they say what they believe in. They like to play with people's minds and they attempt to enjoy life by stirring everything up once in a while, which I think is fun. Love them or hate them, they are here to stay.

    Ilya Grigoriev negative_creep@gmx.de
    TATU ARE NOT GAY!!!!!! Ok, now that i have your attention: A guy called Alexei Shepovalov, a russian psychologist (specialized on kids!) is the manager of the 2 hopelessly untalented dorks and he just did the right thing at the right time. And it's normal if 12 year old girls listen to this stuff and then afterwards make out with their girlfriend, that's exactly what Shepovalov wanted. Oh yeah: the girls are not lesbian, they just needed the money...;)

    Homerjjesse saul9@frontiernet.net
    Poor Adrian, he gives another good review and look what happens... The thing is , if they don't HAVE to make out during a concert and belittle themselves for sales, why would they do it?

    Tatu hater m_segal84@hotmail.com
    WE love tatu...love to hate them. They were given a horrible review for their performance at the MTV Music Awards. I saw it and they really did suck. I thought one of them was a boy and the fact that their fake is discouraging. Itz telling people that you can NOT be yourself to get people to like you. Also the only reason that boyz like them is because they are easy. I mean common they are both boy crazy and would do anything just to get some. They are trailor park trash.At first I thought one was a boy. Hey people POP MUSIC IS DEAD!!! Bands like the White Stripes, Evanescance, Good Charlotte, Blink 182 are in. Canada hates Tatu. WHY? Cuz their shitt. If I ever met them I'd say get your virgin asses back to Russia, stay home and pray for a fucking brain. If they couldn't sing theyd be protitutes LOL Well this was fun.

    Luna gurlsas@hotmail.com
    i LOVE tatu. that all. i love them, and i can understand their russian, i sing along with it! they r the only reason that i am comfortable with my own sexuality.

    Bob bob_247k@hotmail.com
    Hey Tatu lovers, stop all your defensive, screwed up rubbish and listen to Adrian. Tatu do NOT write their own music and they are not talented, I suggest you listen to some PROPER music and read the great reviews on this site (you fuck-ups)

    Jim Jim@hotmail.com
    Shut the hell up you stupid tatu lovers, read the reviews of bands such as The Rolling Stones and Led Zeppelin, buy their albums and forget Tatu.

    Serge orlov-yar@yandex.ru
    I don't like this pop crap. But tatu still not bad. First, comparing to other russian singers they damn good. Their songs have something catchy, and that's why they are popular, not only because of their fake-lesbianity. As I said, I don't like this pop crap, but I think this is a progress over millions-billions of unknown russian "stars", who cant't really sing their "3-chord" songs and stupid love lyrics.

    noblsheep@yahoo.com
    Tatu is ok. C'mon, face it, they're ok. Just that they put on lesbian shows and stuff (I don't like that either) isn't a good reason to garbage up their music. It's good stuff to my ears. I don't understand Russian and I'm not lesbain and I usually listen to Tori Amos. Anyway Tatu is a lot better than most of what I hear from radios these days.

    Rob robert.lovegrove@ntlworld.com
    I have worked with Adrian and conmsider him a friend and trust me, his knowledge of music is second to none. This fact is proved by the fact that only one of the "pro Tatu" people that have posted messages has an acceptable grasp of the English language, and for some reason, I suspect that most of these people are indeed, English. I do however, have respect for other peoples choice of music but given the choice of an obviousley manufactured (I hesitate to use the word) "band" and the likes of The Beatles, the coral and The Libertines who write, play and sing thier own music ....... well it's your choice

    Dan danielofcadman@hotmail.com
    whilst the few pop reviews you do are usually of no interest to me, the readers comments are well worth the effort. We cant beat down to hard on these pro tatu fans. Every youth has their phase of loving a poor band. Well not every! But hopefully by reading your tatu review they may look into some of the more positive reviews. Now to finish off with a cultured and articulate point.."Tatu suck my arse"

    spartacus spartacus6775@yahoo.com
    wow, there are quite a few people who seem to be hating the reviewer. mostly women...interesting. it looks to me the females cant distinguish good from bad music. this is obviously bad music, with them sounding just about like everybody else. one difference though that made them famous: lesbians! its funny that the only the women like tatu, possibly because they are looking for some way to justify their sinned life. pick up a zeppelin album and see if tatu still sounds good (however, knowing women, their ignorance will only block talent from shit) good review adrian!

    LadyLuck Interssss@aol.com
    I think what gets a lot of attention here is the fact that T.A.T.U sings about something that is widely scorned and overlooked in music. I personally like their music...most of it. I like the meaning in their songs, they have good lyrics too. But I must agree that much of it is repetative and we could do with more meaning and less hammering into the head. 90% of their songs apply to this factor that they should stop hammering us in the head. We get it. It's the chorus. But when they do start singing, I really get into it. They're a great duo with a great message and great though repetative songs. I like ATTSS. I like "Not gonna get us" too. Screw it, I never met a T.A.T.U song I didn't like.

    Martyn Cooper wiley442@hotmail.com
    How can you even take something like this seriously: "olol anus tatu is da best band eva da lolzers!one1111" You're all twats. Complete twats of the highest nature. Develop your own taste in music instead of listening to this pop rubbish.

    Brandon Peterson branrocks@msn.com
    I found your review to be well written, and a bit true; the music sounds semi, even fully, at times, emotionless. However, I'm the kind of person who doesn't mind repetitive things, as long as some variety is thrown in, such as in "All the Thing She Said", where after the first minute the music changes, and after the second a wonderful little verse. This song seems emotional to me, but that's because I enjoy the song, and mainly, it stirs emotions in me. The thing is- all these songs about teenage angst and how they are lesbians- is staged. That's why it's s emotionless; their producer and manager told them to fake it for the money. The main point being that you are right, the music is emotionaless.

    felix vaughan felix_292@hotmail.com
    Im not suprised at this huge defense for tatu. Our culture has been diluted full of people with admaration for tasteless attention seeking pop groups. I suspect all the people that like this group are either young or just immature. If u spent a view days listening to greats such as led zeppelin, the kinks, the smiths you wld see the error in your ways. People with genuine musical tallent deserve respect and praise. People who can write there own songs that are diverse and creative. Not some manufactured trash made by a team at some record company.

    Andrew bleustilton@gmail.com
    I've heard a bit of it and I have to say it's terrible. And about the "you don't understand lesbians!" brigade, if I have to understand a culture's nuances to appreciate its (contemporary) art instead of letting it stand on its own, then what is the point of the damn thing? I am not steeped in lesbian literature, yet I feel like I can adequately determine if a piece of music is terrible or not. This is terrible. This music would still be shite if it were written by hamsters. Of course that would make it entertaining at least.


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