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Armand Van Helden

  • 2 Future 4 U,

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    Armand Van Helden

    2Future4U 2 ( 1999 )
    Mother Earth / The Boogie Monster / Business As Usual / Psychic Bounty Killaz / Rock Da Spot / You Don't Know Me / Alienz / Summertime / Yeast / Necessary Evil / Entra Mi Casa / Flowerz

    Joy to the world and peace on earth! Yes, this is what 'the kids' ( at least in the UK ) have been 'getting down' to for the past 15 years or so. Dance music! House Music! Techno!!!! Garage, call it what you will. Thankfully, recent developments have seen a return to Rock N Roll! Kids aged twelve walking around the streets wearing Nirvana T-Shirts with doom laden messages written across them rather than something that resembles a person being sick. Cool backwards baseball cap, sir! Cool little nodding of the head and swaying of the arms as you walk! Seriously, the dominance of the singles charts here by what can generically be classified as 'dance' music ( as opposed to 'electronica', but they fall under the same umbrella I suppose ) has been scary. Almost as if no other music has existed. Dance albums have been somewhat disapointing in terms of sales however. The odd Chemical Brothers or The Prodigy may have broken through due to cross polination in terms of styles mixed within their music. This isn't anything like that. This is straight, bobbing of the head - dance music. Let's have a party, c'mon! It's Thursday evening, we're skint so can't go out! Let's re-create the mood of a dance club in our own living room! Well, we can but try. Let's give this little baby a spin....

    'Mother Earth' opens the record. The beat is, well, fairly simple. I've heard amateur bedroom fanatics produce similar such beats. A sampled female vocal floats in. The requisite rumbling bass sound. The vocal suddenly sounds more real, and at least gives you something to focus on - but for the fact the actual words mean nothing at all. Nothing, whatsoever. They could be latin. In fact - it might sound better if they were. How about Klingon? That would have gained a few sales! The stupidly titled 'Boogie Monster' seems to have sampled a single bar from 'Killer' by Seal. Well, possibly not - but it sounds that way. Why not just listen to 'Killer'? No, lets listen to this one beat beaten into your brain, beaten to oblivion. Oh look, here are some 'funny' processed vocals! Oh joy! This isn't even good so far, as compared to other music within the same genre. 'Psychic Bounty Killaz' I can enjoy for about two minutes. 'Rock Da Spot' at least introduces a different sound to the album with a booming, hypnotic and real sounding bass. The drums sound more real as well, though probably aren't. It isn't a song as such, but it sounds ok. Not much else here does, unfortunately. Everything is so generic, it gets on my nerves. It's an album that serves no purpose as a listening experience. I choose those words carefully. Music is meant to be listened to. Well, at least, albums are. Who plays albums in dance clubs???

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    Readers Comments

    edwin mulroz123@cs.com
    Haha, lways great to review this music. You kno why we actually hear this on the radio ? Because the music industry likes us buying this. This kind of musicians is easy to satisfy with babes and cars and are easy to sell. By the way, just heard the first boots from REM in Dublin, prepare for their new album !!!

    John john.j.doyle@nuim.ie
    Another review I stumbled upon by accident. Gotta agree with Adrian and Edwin, truly dreadful cack that somehow is managing to be passed off as "Cutting Edge" dance music. Spare me.... By the way Edwin, R.E.M. are working in Westmeath, which is in the Irish Midlands. That's a full *50*, (Yes, 50!) miles from Dublin!!!!!!! Adrian will understand wot I mean, I do tend to get tetchy about these things..... :-)

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